Camp Courageous and..Why Are There Kindergartners Hiking Around the Church?

It’s Vacation Bible School time again! Actually, it’s in two weeks, but many preparations are being made and finalized even as we speak. What you see up above is the theme song from last year’s VBS and the backdrop for our story today. There is a story buried in here somewhere, I promise; but some preliminaries need to be covered first.

Vacation Bible School is, by far, the single biggest outreach we do in any given year to young people. In fact, in terms of investment of time and people, it is likely the biggest thing we do all year long.

It runs for a week, Monday through Friday, from 630-830 PM nightly. We will, between teachers, helpers, and students run about 100 people per night in attendance. To illustrate the numbers properly, it needs to be remembered that any Sunday where over 100 come for preaching is considered a big deal.

It’s a big deal

I know it seems like I really am involved with the kids at church, and I guess I am; however, I have a secret! I don’t really naturally like kids that much! Before readers go bonkers on me allow me to explain. I love the kids; I am heavily burdened for the souls and lives of the kids; I am certainly called to that particular ministry. In my natural state, however, I simply have no inborn affinity for these folks. Shocking huh?

Kids are kids. They are not adults. They carry themselves like children, and they act like children. Due to life, I grew up fast and was never really a kid in the sense we know it today. By the time I was 13 or 14 I was basically a fully functioning dysfunctional adult.

Kids are silly. Then don’t make sense and they do silly things I have NEVER been silly. In fact, I trend towards extreme seriousness and somberness. Word on the street is I emerged from the womb a curmudgeon, punched the doctor in the nose, and told him to stop acting silly.

Kids have no goals or objectives. They just….are.. My life was all about goals from a  young age, with the primary goal being that I wanted my life to not be what it was. I was making plans for college at 13.

Kids are full of drama. They have drama within themselves; they have drama with each other; they have drama with their parents. I hate drama. Let me clarify; I hate random drama. The only drama I like is what I create to meet some specific goal I have in mind.

Kids and I are NOT a natural fit. Yet God, in His infinite wisdom has clearly called, cajoled, and beat me into working with them. I have tried to stop, and actually did walk away from them for almost a year. It was not a good year. Can you say chastisement? During that time, He refused to let me be successful at anything I had decided was a better plan. Point made God, thanks.

Back to VBS for one more side track before I tell the story. In past years each teacher has taught one age group for the entire week. We would teach the same group five lessons, one for each night. Last year we changed up and did a rotating thing. We were to teach the same lesson five nights to different age groups. We were to teach kindergarten through 8th grade. It is a good plan, for good reasons.

I had always taught the 5th and 6th graders, could manage with the 7th and 8th, and could muddle my way with the 3d and 4th with help. Kindergartners and 1st and 2 graders? Um..no way! My helper and I cut a deal; I would teach the 3d grade on up, and she was going to do the kindergartners, and 1st and 2d graders. It was a workable plan.

Okay, now on to the actual story!

God is turning me into a silly fool apparently, as one of the most fun things I get to do all year is dress my role based on the theme for VBS. Last year was “Camp Courageous,” which was a camping theme. Last year, I was “Ranger Wally” for a week. Heck even the older kids looked at me as if I had no sense. Hat, boots, shorts, walking stick, and even a little park ranger badge.

Monday through Wednesday(3d grade through 8th) went without a hitch, and I thought I was off the hook, as only the kindergartners and 1st and second graders were left. Not my circus and not my monkeys, so to speak.

At the  appointed time, 6 kindergartners filed in, took seats, and prepared to be entertained(um…taught.) All is quiet on the Western Front at this point in time. Understand that the classes are 45 minutes long to properly understand the following events. We established order, and my helper began teaching, and all seemed well. God has no sense of humor? God doesn’t test us? Things don’t always go as planned? You bet. 10 minutes into a 45 minute class, my helper quite obviously wound down, turned my way, and said words that turned my heart into an ice cube:

“Well, that’s all I have for you all tonight. Ranger Wally, what would YOU like to add?”

Despite my intense, fervent prayers that I be instantly whisked to heaven on a chariot, that failed to occur and something had to be done, and fast! Kindergartners apparently have the attention spans of fleas.

We put little stickers in their books. That took 2 minutes

We colored some bible pictures. I now know David was purple. That took another two minutes.

The fleas began to drift.

We did what any self respecting campers would do. After stern warnings about the need for quietness so as to not wake up the bears and other hungry wild animals in the other classrooms, we took a hike! We hiked up and down the hallway, and even outside in the drive. That used a bit of time.

We hiked to the creek to get some water. That would be the water fountain. We dashed to the woods because a couple now had to….um…..go. The woods, of course, were the bathrooms. We used yet more time.

Finally, we returned to our campsite were we sat around the tent(real) and fire(fake) and ate the marshmallows which were only supposed to be for display. And we told a campfire story. Our story was about a God who loved them, and who came to earth as the man Jesus because He loved them. We told a story about Jesus who would teach them and comfort them and be with them always.

The fleas began to drift again, and class was close to being over, so another hike seemed in order. Since the young ones had had just about all of the quiet they could bear it was obvious their need for noise had to be exploited. So we dashed out the door and had a quick class on not just hiking, but marching in cadence. As in One, Two, Three, FOUR! (The Four being delivered loudly by the group of kindergartners.) In our defense, classes were almost over, so we didn’t really disrupt too much!

So, we trooped down the hall, calling cadence the whole way. Several doors were flung open to see what the ruckus was, but overall the looks were fairly benign as those classrooms were filled with young people and their teachers. As we entered the fellowship hall, where the adult class was being held, the looks got somewhat sterner to say the least. Then, in our grand finale, we trooped into the sanctuary and took our seats for the music portion of the evening.

Usually, I have a point, related to some Bible lesson here in my  posts. Not so much this time. This lesson is easy.

Loosen up! A little fun won’t kill you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just Another Day at Work

The other day, I ate lunch at a little diner and got to stare at and ponder this sign for a bit.

Yep

Bad Yard Art!!!

Apparently Santa and Frosty had a wee bit too much egg nog last night!

“Not One Iote or One Title…”:A Plea for Original Spelling

This is a great post i found over at the Born To Battle blog by John Bookman. Please read it all before you start beating on me!

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Just days ago, I realized that we have not gone far enough in insisting that the Bible be preserved unchanged “in the form God intended for us to have.” Of course, I speak of the infallible, inerrant, verbally-inspired and unalterably preserved English Bible, the Authorized Version (AV 1611), “the Bible God uses and Satan hates.” Sure, there are lots of zealous defenders who have shielded it from the corruptions of such heinous translations as the NIV, the NASB and that most sinister NKJB, and have kept us from returning to the now-completely-unnecessary Hebrew and Greek. But while they kept their watch on one front, the Enemy has come in unawares by another route and sown seeds of corruption that have, I fear, already yielded a corrupt harvest.

What am I getting at? Simply this: we have insisted on the verbal inspiration of the English, that is, that the very English words were divinely chosen and given to the Learned Men. But simply insisting on the perfection of the English words and preserving the words is not enough. A careful consideration of the true intent and meaning of the words of Matthew 5:18 is necessary: “Till heauen and earth passe, one iote or one title, shall in no wise passe from the law, till all be fulfilled.” (I have made no mistake in my spelling, as I shall shortly explain). Notice how Jesus insisted on the verbal inspiration, not just of the words, but also of the very letters of the words of Scripture. And since this verse is a specific promise of the preservation of Scripture in our infallible English Bible, we must insist on following, not just the original KJV words but also their very spelling. What other meaning can we draw out of the words “one iote or one title”? Every letter–the very spelling–is certainly inspired, and to alter the spelling of a single word, to alter even a single letter in a single word, is to deny and reject the inspiration of the AV 1611. If God had wanted us to spell the words in the AV 1611 different in our Bibles, He would have given them to us in that form originally. Modern spelling is as hideous and hateful a thing as modern translations. Its new age corruption, pure and simple. No one was ever authorized to corrupt, to “modernize” the infallible original spelling. There are eight spelling corruptions in John 3:16 alone!

I’m sure some “liberal” soul will say, “What difference does spelling make?” Argue it out with Jesus, brother! Didn’t He say that inspiration of the words included the very spelling, every iote, not just the words? Will you reject the teaching of Matthew 5:18 of letter/spelling inspiration of our preserved AV 1611? To stop at “word inspiration” and not insist on spelling inspiration is to be second cousin to mere “thought inspiration.” It is creeping apostasy, through and through. Next someone will deny the inspiration of the chapter and verse numberings in the AV 1611. Where will it stop?

And I think we must recognize that Jesus’ infallible English word was “title” and not the now-corrupted “tittle.” A tittle is part of the ornamentation of a Hebrew letter (at least that’s what I’ve heard at Fellowship meetings, so I have assurance that it’s right). But a title is something else. I have complete confidence that this promise of Jesus was a specific reference to the preservation of the chapter and page headings, the titles found in the original AV 1611. Sadly, those infallible titles, attached by the Learned Men under divine inspiration at the top of each page and at the beginning of each chapter have been removed from our modern editions. Without them, we cannot claim that we have a perfectly preserved Bible, and by allowing them to be removed, we have called God a liar, and denied that He is able to preserve the inspired English Bible He has given us.

It is no secret that none of the commonly used English Bibles published in our day have the original AV 1611 spelling, or punctuation (that, too, is part of our directly inspired, infallible English Bible) or titles of which Jesus spoke, so in reality, these Bibles, even though they say “King James Version” or “Authorized Version” are really not Bibles at all. Only the Nelson reprint of the original 1611 AV is a real Bible; all the others are sinister corruptions.

And there is growing upon me the deep conviction, as deep as anything I’ve written in this article, that no English-speaking person can be saved if he was not saved by an original, unaltered AV 1611, with original spelling, original punctuation, and original chapter and page titles. This simply means that anyone who thought he was saved by reading a revised “KJV” or by hearing a sermon from such a “Bible” or by reading a Gospel tract that quoted the words in a revised spelling form, even if it was labelled “KJV” is not really saved, has never been saved, and never will be saved until he gets a true, fully-preserved AV 1611. That will mean that virtually all those who thought they were saved–preachers, deacons and all–will have to go back and get truly saved through a real AV 1611, then get rebaptized. Verbal inspiration of the English requires inspiration of the very spelling as well. Anything less is rank modernism.

I will confess to one further worry: original type style. The real AV 1611 was printed in what printers call “black letter,” a very ornate type style much like Gothic script, which is still used many times for the banner at the top of the front page of newspapers. This original type style was replaced with “Roman” type sometime in the 18th century. Note that name: Roman. I fear that once again, the Jesuits have conspired to corrupt the pure word in English. They have taken away the original Gothic (and as everyone knows, the Gothic Bible used the textus receptus for its foundation which proves with certainty that the Gothic was the correct script for a real Bible), and have substituted the corrupt Roman script. In a real sense, even the KJV has become a Roman Bible, since its modern editions use Roman script and not the original black letter. As further proof that Roman type is a corruption, notice that all these apostate Bibles–the ERV, ASV, NASB, NIV, NKJB, and the rest, have always been printed in Roman type. That’s proof enough to me that any Bible in Roman type is no Bible at all, and that only a Bible with the original script, the black letter, given to us in the form we should have it by the Learned Men, is a true Bible. Perhaps even those saved by the true original spelling KJV are not saved at all, and must locate a black letter edition. The Roman script Nelson reprint may not be enough (it’s just like those Bible corrupters at Thomas Nelson to pass off a Roman script KJV as though it were a real Bible!). Fortunately for me, my brother has a facsimile reprint in the original black letter of the AV 1611, and I’m secure since I’ve studied out of it several times.

It is a desperate situation. The shortage of black letter, original spelling AV 1611 Bibles is severe. There is truly a famine of the preserved word of God in the land. And all our efforts at preaching, teaching, Bible study, and soul winning are completely futile until we return to the real, unaltered, perfectly preserved bonafide AV 1611. Perhaps the best thing to do for the present is to send off and buy one of those pages from an original KJV, and if you can get a page that has a salvation verse, or part of the “Romans road,” perhaps there will be enough of the Gospel in the true preserved English to rescue your soul.

[As a service to the reader, so he can be saved through a real AV 1611, I will quote John 3:16; unfortunately, I have no capacity to reproduce the original black letter script, so even believing the unrevised spelling may not be enough, but we can hope for the best:

For God so loued ye world, that he gaue his only begotten Sonne: that whosoeuer beleeueth in him, should not perish, but haue euerlasting life.

And just today, I came to understand that the only proper format for any Bible is in scroll form (or at least loose-leaf), since the Apostle assures us that “the word of God is not bound.” Therefore any book that is bound, regardless of its printed contents, cannot honestly be said to be the word of God. I’m sure the inspired 1611 translators never intended for their translation to come sown and within leather covers. Such would be a travesty, in light of the Apostle’s clear and plain teaching.

I’ve begun the systematic unstitching of all my sewn Bibles so that they can qualify, according to Paul’s definition, as the word of God. I urge you to do the same.

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If you haven’t already figured it out, the above piece is satire. It was written by Doug Kutilek. I found it at an excellent site devoted to the KJV only controversy.

Read the original article here

I Have Met the Devil, and He is me(apparently)

A few days back I posted the following Just a Thought message

Satan is an imitator and a deceiver.  His specialty is looking and sounding like the real thing without being the real thing.

The post is here(as a shameless plug for my own blog)

https://truthinpalmyra.wordpress.com/2015/05/12/just-a-thought-178/comment-page-1/#comment-4509

Well. it wasn’t before too long that my favorite Egyptian stone headed stalker/troll cruised by and made the following comment:

I just knew there was something not right about you!

I had the brief thought that stonehead was implying that I was Satan, but I just tossed it aside as absurd. Mostly, because that fellow doesn’t actually believe in God and Satan and all of that stuff.

Well, then I got the following comment:

Pulse is just fine thank you, Satan Wally.

Evangelicals are a breed apart, of this there is no doubt. 🙂
Before long you will all be marrying your cousins just to maintain your version of Utopia … y’all

There you have it, readers. I am indeed the Devil Himself!

Additionally, I am a incestuous fundie as well!

And to top it off, I don’t speak very good English.

If all of these things are true, ya’ll might want to stop reading this blog. Just sayin.

Cuckoo for Coffee

Yesterday, Julie over at LIght and Life posted a great post about the God given joy of wonderful food. And another blogger, Sandra chimed in with some thoughts as well. We specifically got to talking about coffee.

Now, I love coffee. I love coffee in every variety and of every type. I don’t love so much the Starbucks kind of coffee, although it has its place. My Keurig Coffee maker and I are best friends. Well, ok, we are very close friends. My actual best friend is my Thermos which I use to carry coffee with me during the work day.

When do I drink coffee? When does the Earth spin on its axis? Odds are high that if I am awake I will have a cup, although I do try to cut myself off around 7 at night. It’s not the caffeine that wakes me up, it’s the bathroom breaks!

Did I mention I love coffee?

Ok, now let’s get serious for a few moments. God gave me coffee. Back in eternity past God, as He looked to the future, knew I would be here and He knew how much I would love coffee. That concept itself makes my head hurt, but it is a fact.

What had to happen to give me coffee? I’m no biologist, but some things had to happen to give me coffee. Even now, so many things in tandem have to occur just so that I can have a cup of coffee. How could those things have happened by random chance? The idea is preposterous!

God created the plant, which created the bean, which gave me coffee. God created the man who would some day find that those beans were really tasty when roasted and steeped in hot water. The list goes on, until eventually I have my Thermos filled.

God put many things here for us to enjoy, and He even implanted in us the desire to have and enjoy them. Food, beverages, sex, art, music; the list goes on and on. In fact, the list is all inclusive, because if it exists, it exists because God created it.

It’s not the desire itself, of even the things we desire that is the problem. Problem one comes when we enjoy anything in excess, inappropriately, or at the expense of God. Problem two is the converse to that, as that comes from excess legalism which causes us to say some things are wrong simply because they are enjoyable.

A Random Thought

This is quite random for me, but lately I seem to have become addicted to the 70’s at 7 on Sirius XM radio. But the burden of this question has become more than I can bear.

How did the Bee Gees sing in those falsetto voices for SO LONG without causing permanent injury?

 

Hey..Check out THIS Global Warming

Southeast Arkansas, in March. It never snows here. Woke up to THIS this morning. That’s three times this year. Darn that global warming.

Would Mikey Eat Kale Quinoa Salad?

I am a fairly serious fellow, and I tend to write about fairly serious things; however I do have a sense of humor buried way down deep and sometimes I get tickled about something. From what I have seen, WordPress is a good place to express oneself when one gets tickled.

Okay. I love food. I love to eat it, cook it, and even just touch it. I am of the school that says the best kitchen utensil every created is the human hand.

I eat enough food, honestly, to feed the average family. I am also blessed with the ability to do this and not ever grow in girth; apparently I have the metabolism of a shrew.

The running joke at supper is the fact that no matter what we eat, I push back from the table and say, “Whew…that is my FAVORITE meal.” Whatever I happen to be eating is always my favorite thing to eat.

I do hate some foods however.

• Hominy. For those of you who don’t know what that is; trust me it’s gross.
• Cottage cheese. Look, just leave the milk on the counter for a few days and drink it. Same thing.
• Squid. I don’t care if you fancy it up and call it calamari, it’s still little pieces of stinky fishy rubbber.

Other than those things, food is pretty much fair game. My favorite vegetable? Turnip greens. One year when they were in season I ate them daily for almost a month. Apparently, that is a bad idea. They are very high in calcium, and evidently will cause kidney stones if you subsist on just them…ouch is all can say to that.

Okay, on to the thing that tickled me. My blogging friend, James, over at the Isaiah 53:5 Project wrote a post entitled

I 53:5 Fitness. Do not eat queeno, ever

In this post, James waxed quite eloquently on the evils of something called quinoa.

Later my blogging friend, Insanitybites, over at See, There’s This Thing Called Biology wrote a post entitled.

Foodie Blogging

 

In this post, IB waxed quite eloquently about the evils of kale. (which is actually decent mixed with some turnip greens.)

Well, this one is for you two, my friends. I know that as soon as you read this, you will immediately get busy in the kitchen. Let me know how it comes out, will you?

The Girl in the Blue Apron had the following to offer.

Meatless Mondays: Quinoa With Kale

 

ENJOY!!!!